PLEASE make sure your child knows they are loved.
Your child IS NOT the sum of their behaviour.
Behaviour is simply an outward expression of our understanding and state in the moment.
Love the essence of the human in front of you and if a specific behaviour isn’t acceptable share that with them and tell them which behaviours ARE encouraged.
You may think you ‘should’ be listened to because you’re a parent or adult with a role of supporting young people. And yes maybe you ‘should’ be….but the fact is, we’re human first before any of our roles come into play.
And being human being means having rapport with the person in front of you makes the likelihood of that conversation going well FAR more likely.
Being in rapport means feeling safe and connected.
And feeling loved is a sure fire way to be in rapport.
It’s a win: win.
And to counter the defence that ‘it’s hard’ when your child has done something for the umpteenth time to stay calm and reconnect with them to show them they are loved. Of course it feels hard in that moment….and if that’s YOU feeling that way with your fully developed brain, why oh why is it ok to defer responsibility for connection to our kids?
You’re both walking the same path, but you’re the leader.
So breathe, focus on what you REALLY want to happen and take action when you’ve fallen out of your stormy thinking and are back in a resourceful state.
Lead with love and kindness ❤️