Understanding parenting styles
According to Psychologists today there are 4 types of parenting styles:
- Authoritative parenting
- Authoritarian parenting
- Permissive parenting
- Uninvolved/Neglectful parenting.
We all have different ways of parenting and all use unique ways of communicating and behaving with our children and young people. The way we parent have a huge impact on childhood development, adolescence and into adulthood.
By learning more about what your parenting style may be it can help with communicating with others involved in the parenting of your young people.
The intention of this article is to explore different styles of parenting to help discover what suits you and perhaps those that do not suit your family so much.
How each of us parent often comes down to what we have learned previously.
- So can be how we were parented or
- From what we have learned in education and more.
When co-parenting it can be a cause of frustration when trying to combine two parenting styles.
Do you know what your style is?
Do you know your partners?
Become Curious
One of the expressions we use a lot is ‘get curious’ when it comes to understanding thoughts, beliefs and behaviours of any individual. So, let’s explore that further in the context managing different parenting styles.
As with all behaviours there are usually behaviours that can trigger frustration, mis-communication and often upset. Being parent or carer is a tough job! We try our best to guide our young people, protect them and keep them safe because we Love them.
Is your parenting the right way? is your partners way wrong? or is it just different?
There is no doubt that both parents or carers simultaneously feel love yet feel frustration when it comes to managing Co-parenting, but how often do we communicate these frustrations when we are calm?
Now Consider
What influences your parenting style? Is it conscious or are you just doing what you innately know? How comfortable with parenting are you? is it natural or do you struggle to trust your own style?
Now consider those questions with your partner?
What influences their parenting?
Who are their role models?
Who else influences them?
Could outside influences affect how you parent? is your lack of trust in yourself or our partner causing frustration and you hear yourself saying ”Why did I react that way” or ”I wish i had just said/did it this way” . Then you are left feeling guilty over not doing it the way you thought.
If that is the case, how often do you trust your own parenting and that you both know what is best for your child?
What comes up for you now having considered these points and questions? Has it shifted your perspective in any way?
Intentional Behaviours
Equally, it can certainly be the case that the behaviour is intentional and they are aware of their parenting style.
Again, if we press pause and get curious what could be behind those deliberate behaviours there can be a variety of reasons.
We’d love to get your thoughts on what we’ve shared above so please do comment below.